‘The grass is always greener’ and other lies we believe

A few years ago I was walking through the airport on my way to my gate and I stopped at the gift shop. I usually bring a book to read but this time I didn’t so I walked up to the book section. I found one that immediately grabbed my attention. It was about a concept that I had never really thought about. What if we really did get all the things we wanted when we wanted them? Would that make us happy? The conclusion the writer came up with was no. The joy we find in life is from the things we go through every day that we didn’t think we were going to go through. I was going to buy the book, but it was a hardback copy and it was over priced (as everything is at the airport) so I just told myself I would buy it when I got home. I didn’t buy it. I have been looking for it ever since. The problem is that I don’t remember the name!

The reason I am bringing this story up right now is because of a discussion I had yesterday. On twitter a question was posed: “When I get what I want, will I want what I’ve got?”

My response to that was, “No. People want what they don’t have, the hunt is where the thrill exists.” I guess the problem with this is that I was not talking about myself, I was talking about people in general.

It made me stop and take a look at myself. Do I think that the grass is really greener on the other side of the fence? Am I only interested in the “hunt” and not on actually getting what I say I want. The conclusion I came to is sometimes. It freaked me out to think that I might be part of the group that is more interested in chasing things than in actually getting what I want, so I decided do some soul searching and some research.

According to everything I could find online it takes an income of $75,000 per year right now to be happy. I found multiple articles and studies that said this was the magic number and here is one of the articles: “How Much Money Makes You Happy?”

I don’t make $75,000 per year currently. At no point in my life have I made $75,000 per year up to this point. I am a happy guy. I really am happy. One of the things I found out in my research is that people stress about money a lot! I have seen that in the lives of friends and family. I am not really one to stress about money. I don’t need stuff. There is no bigger, better, nicer thing that I am saving my money to get. I am not running up credit cards so I can out-do my neighbors. That is just not who I am. I’m not saying that I am somehow the only person who is not materialistic and consumed with stuff. I know a lot of people who are less worried with what they have than they are in how much they can help someone else.

This all made me realize a few things. First off, there are a lot of people consumed with themselves and their own stuff. If the research that was done is correct than wow…we are really all about things in America today. I guess I knew that, but hadn’t thought about it in a while.

Another thing it made me realize is that there is so much more in life than just me and my stuff. When we get our eyes off of us and onto how we can make a difference we can change lives. There are people who change lives every day. People who do a lot more than me…and probably more than you too. I’m not trying to make anyone feel guilty for having stuff. If you make over $75,000 then that is awesome for you!

My only question is will you help someone else or will you keep it just for you and yours? I find that helping people with what I have been given is way more rewarding and brings me more happiness than spending it on myself. I know I can’t be alone in that.

I know a guy who gives more than he takes. You may or may not agree with everything he says or exactly how he does what he does…but he helps people that others ignore. Take a second and consider helping him help others. If not him, find someone or something you believe in and make a difference. We can change the world for the better. We just have to get our eyes off of ourselves.

Go to http://www.theoneinc.org/ or click the picture below.

The more you know…doesn’t matter if you ignore it.

I was thinking last night about all the things that we as Americans know…and ignore every single day. You might not think that you ignore things, but you do.

We all know how bad fast food is for us. We have seen or at least heard of the documentaries about the dangers of eating fast food. So why are the lines so long at all McDonald’s still?

We know that smoking is bad for us. The warnings are on the side of the packs. The commercials are on tv about the “Truth” when it comes to smoking. A pack of cigarettes costs over $5 last time I saw a sign for them. So they are expensive and they kill you…yet how many people do you know that still smoke every day?

Drunk driving kills people. We know that. Alcohol in mass quantities will ruin your liver, your family and in the long run your life. We know that. MOST people don’t stop with just one drink at dinner, at least not in America. So why is it that Friday night the most popular place in the country is a bar or a club? Why do we bring a 24 pack of beer to a softball game knowing we have to drive home? Why do we continue to pick up our keys after we have been at the club drinking “socially” with our friends?

As married men and women we know that if we cheat on our spouse we will ruin more lives than just our own. We know that our kids will grow up in a broken home or grow up not seeing one of their parents. We KNOW that trust is the cornerstone of every good relationship, not just a marriage. We are aware of the consequences to our actions. Still people will cheat on their spouse today. They will make excuses of how their spouse “made” them do it or their spouse “drove them” to cheat. No one made us do anything. We made a choice, knowing it would ruin lives.

We know that texting or talking on our phones while we drive is dangerous. We have seen the stats of people who text and drive. We yell at the person on their phone while they cut us off in traffic because they were not paying attention. Still when our phone rings we answer it. When we need to have someone know we are almost there we send that text while we are still on the highway. We know it is a distraction. We know it is dangerous. Yet we still do it.

We know that it is wrong to hate. We know that we should love people. We know that it is ALWAYS wrong to hate people. It is always wrong to talk about people behind their back. We know that it is wrong to hate a people group for what they think, say, do or believe is wrong. So why do we do it? Why do you make jokes about that person? Why do you look down on those people because they are different from you? Why do you assume things about people because of where they are from or how they are dressed? Why do you talk about your co-workers the way you do when you are out with your friends?

If I haven’t hit on something that you do that you know is wrong then you are lying to yourself and now you are lying to me! 😉 We do things we know are wrong for a lot of different reasons. Sometimes we do them because they are convenient. Sometimes it is because it seems like it would make us happy, regardless of what it will do to other people.

I am well aware that this blog post will not change your life. You are still going to do things you know are wrong. You are still going to endanger the lives and feelings of those people you come into contact with. I just want you to think about it for a few minutes. I want you to stop next time you are getting ready to say or do something hateful and remember that you already know it is wrong. Just because you think that the fun you are going to have will out weigh the consequences in your own life does not mean it will out weigh the effects you will have on others lives. People are broken. Why do you need to make it worse by being selfish?